When anxiety gripped my life......

I was speaking to a friend about her girl the other day, and her worrying some about her daughter's anxiety, she is at a tough age, and gosh if there aren't a lot of reasons to be anxious these days right???......and I share about being free of my anxiety finally now.....but I was not always free.....not by a long shot.....in my 20s I went through a terrible and fierce anxiety disorder.....it came on like a storm, and took over every single part of my life......and now as I type that, maybe it wasn't quite as sudden as it felt.....I was a nervous Nellie kinda kid, till I hit my teens lol:) But I for sure had worry tendencies, and overthinking ones etc.....and as I have learned more and more about myself along the way it all makes much more sense......but then it felt like my brain had a mind of its own, and I was its hostage.....and in my 20s I was in a terrible relationship....surprise right;-) and I was knowing I needed to end it, without wanting to end it, and at the same time my thyroid started acting up, and I was hyperthyroid........ and it was making my heart race and giving me vertigo....so I started not being able to sleep because the room would spin, and my heart was skipping beats constantly and well.....the perfect storm emerged.....sleep deprived and scared, and kicking my little girl that worried endlessly about everyone, and everything into high gear, and a panic disorder was born.....and it gripped my life....no question......it was one of the worst things I have endured in this life.....I was terrified all of the time......worried about my health, about having a heart attack on the spot, not feeling "safe" anywhere, having panic attacks daily.....and being completely run by fear......and it was horrid......it affected so many areas of my life.....and while I wasn't suicidal and never have been.....I want to make that CLEAR:) it was the one and only time, I could understand how somebody could become so desperate for their life to improve, and how somebody could be suffering so, that suicide seems like the only way.......I was suffering so immensely.....it felt torturous........and it felt like it was outside of me.....this intruder that had seized my life....and then I realized I was feeding it.....and I was committed to regaining my life.....so I read a bunch of books.....I consulted a doctor, and took some medicine for a bit to get over the hump....and did cognitive behavioral therapy with a lovely therapist.......ended that relationship and slowly reclaimed my life.....kicking and screaming.....not willing to succumb to that for the rest of my life.....but it was a formidable force, and challenge in my life....and it has never come back again.....I came off the medicine.....and learned a ton......and then during the subsequent trials my life faced I think I learned to shed more and more pieces of the me that gave anxiety a home......realizing that the power was within me.....until present day....... where anxiety has no home within me anymore.......I don't "what if "think, I don't worry about things that cannot be changed, I don't fret, I don't feed it at all......I intentionally starve all things worry and anxiety, and have the gift of living FREE:)......it took almost 50 years, but better late than never:) And I mean that wholeheartedly......I share this in the hopes of offering hope to somebody else.....anxiety and panic is a horrid thing to live with....and if you have never endured it, it is hard to understand......I DO UNDERSTAND......and part of my coaching goals in the new year wants to encompass helping people overcome those types of challenges too......living FREE in every way! Reach out if I can help:) Happy Wednesday!